Originally uploaded by RXAphotos
When I have Matthew (normally one day per week) he drives me insane with his constant badgering and requests to do things. It’s a horrible thing to say but sometimes I count the hours until I can drop him off back at his mothers. A couple of weekends ago he was in fine form and I couldn’t wait to pack him off. He was rude, disobedient and a downright pain in the arse.
But what he doesn’t know is that when he is with his mother, there is a huge part of me missing.
I wish I was a better father those times he is around but I know that if I get too close the days he isn’t around hurt twice as much … like today.
I rang Lucy at work hoping to get her voice mail as I knew she had a lot of meetings today. I just needed to hear her voice. Silly girl answered her phone. Even sillier girl still wants to be with me even though I can be an emotional roller coaster at times. 
Comments from members of the flickr community (as well as talking to Lucy) have helped buck me up a lot this morning. Thanks guys!
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